Cousins, A Crossover Fic
by AnaUzumaki
Summary: Cobra Bubbles and Nick Fury are cousins. Rated T for minor cursing. It is Fury after all.


**Summary: **Cobra Bubbles and Nick Fury are cousins.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything Lilo and Stitch/Avengers related, sorry.

**A/N: ** This is a quick based on a something I saw on Tumblr. Special thanks to my best friend for helping me. I got lazy towards the end. This is for Alena.

-Ana Uzumaki

* * *

.: "'Ohana" means "family." "Family" means "no one gets left behind." :.

_: ― Lilo :._

* * *

COUSINS, A CROSSOVER FIC

_QUADRANT 17, SECTION 005, AREA 51, A PLANET CALLED __EEE-ARTH__._

_KIKI'S COFFEE HOUSE, HANA ON MAUI,_ _KAUAI_

_**August 12, 2011, 10:19 PST**_

The sky, like always, is a pale Robin's egg blue and, like always, not a cloud can be found sprawling over the endless plateau. The roast fills the morning air making it sharp with the smells of the various brews. The sun has already made her appearance, settling in her place in the sky above but the shade of an overhead umbrella provides a comforting coolness about the suited man. In any other place, on any other island, this might be considered normal, a businessman hovering over a newspaper. Luckily for the islanders, this guy is a regular.

One sip of his coffee and he breathes deep, straightening out the newspaper again. The National Inquirer, the title reads. Now what good standing businessman would bother with that flaky fictitious publication?

_Let's see how the world is handling itself today_, he thinks to himself. He shakes his head, sighing, frowning as the events, seemingly incredulous, become ridiculous.

"Himalayan ambassador caught eating feces... Goes to show the jess'Icans from Karb'Log XIV cannot control their appetite...," he remarks quietly to himself. He ignores the untouched pastry beside him. The man reads over several more titles, making small comments to himself that if anyone else was to overhear would certainly force upon this man a one way ticket on the crazy train.

He turns the page, taking another sip when he finally gets to the main story. "Hmm... 'It's raining gods, hallelujah?' Let's see... Rainbow laser?... Cosmic scientists... Hammer of Justice?"

He reads the lines over and over again. Taking off his glasses, he glares at the story. "Aliens," he sighs, as if this is the only logical answer.

In Hawaii there is this thing referred to simply as _Ohana_. It was a lesson this man, sitting alone at a small table on a tiny island, learned over several long years with a very eccentric little girl. He sighs and sets down the news paper on the patio table and adjusts his glasses.

Pulling on his blazer, taking off a bit of dust on his shoulders, he takes a lengthy sip, giving that low hum of enjoyment as his massive hands cradle the warmth of the small ceramic cup. "Definitely my cup of coffee," he shakes his head.

He sets the cup down and begins to take a bite out of his pastry, but he is interrupted his cell phone ringing. After a bit of mastication, he hears the phone beep a last time, and he smirks. Another call straight to voicemail, he nods triumphantly. After a moment of enjoying himself, he takes out his phone and checks the number. The number is a set of seven zeros and in between them is a dash.

Whoever it is left a message. He sighs and after further contemplation after accessing the voicemail, he replaces the blue tooth inside his ear. With a button press, a familiar voice rings in his ear.

"Hey, Hawaii man. I need you to come over to the mainland. There is a small problem, and I have no doubt you have read it in the hot pages. I'm freaking out, man. Oh, and I'll pay for lunch, this time. Fury out."

He frowns, rubbing his brow while taking off his glasses. After rubbing his face, he looks for a pay phone. Nearest one is across the street. With a huff and he stands tall. Fixing his tie, he crosses the street, looking both ways before he steps onto the asphalt.

The sidewalk is soon before his feet and he picks up the phone. In goes a quarter and the number. After one ring, he hangs up.

Crossing his arms, he waits for the call. The pay phone rings. He picks up. "This is Agent Roswell."

"What the hell kind of a codename is that, 'Agent Roswell'?" The other voice on the line gives no joy to the Agent. Audibly expressed, he answers. "I think I liked it better when you went by Cobra Bubbles."

"Fury," he sighs, leaning back into the plastic wall of the booth. "Nick Fury."

"Drop the act, Cobra. We're cousins, don't get all uptight like something crawled up your ass and-"

"What do you want Nick?" Cobra cuts him off.

"I need some friendly advice and I figured you've had enough time lounging away on a tropical island."

"Advice on your Alien problem," he sighs. Cobra looks down at his hands and cracks them. "What do you want to know?"

"I knew you would say that. I'm up the street. Let's do lunch."

"You're where?" Cobra frowns. "Of course you are. Fine, meet me in five."

"I could always count on you catching on, cuz. I'll pay for lunch."

"Pay for-" He sighs. Of course this little problem is always where you are. "Five minutes. Two blocks south."

He hangs up and resets his glasses, tugging once more on his tie and jacket, walking along the street, bowing his head in a hello manner when a stranger passes by. A brief moment and he looks up. Through his dark shades, he could see the large letters.

"O'Hanas. Nice and quiet," a voice pipes up behind him. Cobra turns around, taking off his glasses and smirking at the smaller bald man.

"Never did learn to take your own style, did you?"

"Let's just say. Man. In order to be the best, you gotta' look like 'em."

"Wanna' get points?" Cobra crosses his arms while Nick places fists on his hips.

"I wanna' get some tips, Cuz."

Cobra extends an arm and Nick bows his head, wrapping an arm around his cousin and begins to talk."So, how goes everything in this part of the ocean?"

"It's quiet. Let's me read a lot better."

The doors open and a chirpy voice announces, "Welcome to O'Hanas~ Family, Food and fantastic fun. Table for two?"

The pair nods and follows the waitress to the back of the small café. She seats them in a window booth and leaves them with their menus.

"Alright, lay it on me Bubbles. What do I do?"

"Why do you want advice from me anyway?" He sighs, gazing at the menu.

"Because you've been doing this awhile," Fury shrugs. "Your work with the…," he trails off, trying to find the right word. Giving up, he decides to go with the obvious. "Alien experiments seem to have gone well."

"I had help."

"Who?"

"It doesn't matter," Cobra shakes his head.

Fury doesn't pick up his menu, leaning forward and putting his arms on the table, much to the dislike of Cobra, who grunted at this.

"So, let me get this straight. You are gonna deny me the best chance I have against this alien threat, simply because you don't want me to know your help?"

"My help was specialized to my problems. And you have yet to tell me yours."

"Didn't you read it in the hot pages?" He leans back, frowning with crossed arms.

"I want you to tell me what's going on, Nick. I can't help you if you don't tell me your side, my cousin."

"Last year, Earth had a visit from another planet that had a grudge match that leveled a small town. We learned that only are we not alone, but we are hopelessly, hilariously outgunned."

"It's plain and simple," he answers. "Don't deal with aliens. It's all about rules."

"Look here Motherfucker; these aliens don't give a shit about rules."

Cobra lowers his glasses, cracks his knuckles, and looks Fury in the eye. "When this is all over, ask the alien's ruler and I will bet you my gasses against your eye patch, there were rules broken."

He glares at Nick, who stares back at him, anger coming between them.

Nick breaks the silence with a scoff and a small laugh. "So you think these assholes are all hurt over a few broken rules?"

Cobra backs down as well, returning to the menu. "They aren't just a 'few broken rules,' Nick. Rules are the backbone to any alien civilization."

"So what?" Nick moves his hands about. "We just abide by their rules?"

"Did I ever say that, Nick?"

"The hell you didn't, muthafucka." He laughs again, and leans forward, clapping and rubbing his hands to see the menu. "Let's see, let's see... Grilled... Grilled pork, chicken... Beef..."

Some moments pass while the two decide on their individual meals. Nick notices the waitress coming their way, and he waves her over. She smiles and nods, taking a moment to take out a pen.

"I'm ready to order, are you?"

"I'm ready, thank you, Nick."

The waitress arrives promptly, smiling softly.

"And for you two, gentlemen, what can I start you off with?"

"My cousin here," Cobra gestures to Nick," is new in town, so take his order first."

"Alright sir." She turns to Nick, trying hard not to stare at the eye patch.

"And for you, sir? Something to drink?"

"I will have water, my cousin will probably have more coffee." Cobra laughs and shakes his head, and Nick smirks. "Also, I am ready to order the..."

He reviews the menu again.

"The mala-mala... How do you say that?"

He points to the item, and shows it to the waitress.

"Ah, the Malasadas. Yes, a wonderfully sweet treat. And for you, Mr. Bubbles?"

"Manapuas and the usual coffee, miss."

"Of course, Mr. Bubbles," she answers. She gives a little bow and walks off, repeating the order in her head.

"Mr. Bubbles, huh? Wow, looks like this was a long vacation for you, cuz."

"You do realize that I have been working here for the past several years, right, Nick?"

"Don't act like I am some sort of dense prick, 'Mr. Bubbles,' " he grins.

Nick chuckles, getting up in his seat and rubbing his hands together as he smells the amazing scents coming from their dishes.

"My, my, my, I'll be damned if I don't stay here longer."

"It certainly does grow on you."

The two talk for a while as they eat, and into the late afternoon they enjoy each other's company. Soon, Nick has to stop and go back. Cobra walks him out and sees his little cousin off to save the world in his stead.

He replaces his glasses and looks for his car, hearing the pattering nearby of a familiar little blue alien.

* * *

Some months later, Nick Fury has just finished a video meeting with the council. He sighs and rests his stance, rubbing his head as the tries to cool off.

His assistant comes in.

"Agent Hill, reporting."

"At ease, Hill." He steps off the podium and out of the little chamber.

"Any news of how the meeting went?"

"Besides them all leaving, as they said, you have a call, sir."

"A call?" He gives her a look with slited eyes.

"He insists that he talk to you immediately, but that he does not have enough time."

"Have you been able to track down his location?"

"Negative, sir. But he says that he knows you, and that his message is brief."

Again, Fury sighs and nods, placing an ear piece into his ear that when its handed to him by Agent Hill. "This is Director Fury."

"Director." You could hear the nodding in his voice, and the smirk that was on the face of the person on the other line.

"This is Agent Cobra Bubbles. I told you. Aliens are all about rules."


End file.
